I WORRY

By: Claire Scott
I won’t be good at it
confusing rows of pills in orange vials
two pink ones at noon instead of at night
forgetting the antiseptic wipe
and sterile gloves when I flush his port
I worry I will be resentful
anger unfurling like a wind-whipped flag
overcooking his eggs
forgetting to order Depends
I worry my life will be swallowed
by his needs
no time to walk, to write
to have tea with friends
I worry I will be lonely
I watch others in the clinic
one helping her husband
find his phone, his hands shaking
another loudly repeats
that that this Dr. Stanley’s office
you remember Dr. Stanley
as she pushes the wheelchair
to the men’s room
I notice the wet on his pants
another woman softly says
time to put our coat on
as she gentles him awake
I worry I am afraid
of death’s warm breath
what happened
whatever happened
to the happy life they shared
now a distant memory
how can they do it
after sixty years
soft with sadness
waves part, the past
flows how can I not
Claire Scott is an award-winning poet who has received multiple Pushcart Prize nominations. Her work has appeared in the Atlanta Review, Bellevue Literary Review, New Ohio Review and Healing Muse among other journals. Claire is the author of Waiting to be Called and Until I Couldn’t.
